Why are there no good quotes about brunettes?

Around 6pm last night my life as a blond was suddenly cut short and my new life as a dark-chestnut brunette rapidly began. As Polly, my stylist, stripped my hair of it's natural color and applied one of a much darker tone, I wondered out loud if a female's hair color really affects her status as much as the dumb-blond, boring-brunette stereotypes make us think. Polly, in her heavy Brooklyn accent, answered, "Of course it does, sweethaaaat."

Before I could ask what she meant, she lurched into a conversation about her mother's lack of interest in the trends of hairstyles ("the woman has the same damn haacut she had in the 70's, fa Christssake!"), and when having a conversation with Polly, the only acceptable subject matter is what Polly wants to talk about. That being said, I was left to research and conclude an answer to my probing question by myself.

The results were not surprising. According to various sources, polls, and ignorant men, as a brunette, I am:

• Better suited for marriage than my flaxen-haired counterparts
• Plain, humble, and eager to please (Hahahahahaha!)
• "Earthy" (Because my hair is the color of tree bark? If we are going to base our traits off of the color of other items, does this mean I have been greedy all along, since my hazel eyes mirror copper pennies?)
• Intelligent, self-sufficient, and independent (My dad would say otherwise. "You better marry rich!" he likes to say)

So, although I can only speak for myself, I am definitely not fitting of the brunette-stereotype, and I plan to have just as much fun as a brunette as I did as a blond. I am still attractive. I will probably still be on the receiving end of stupid pick-up lines from stupid men. I don't feel any less, or more, intelligent.

I dyed my hair dark because I felt like it.

If someone said, "Why did the green-eyed girl stare at the orange juice carton for an hour? Because it said concentrate!," we would, by default, consider that person an idiot.

"You're stereotyping someone because of their eye color?" we would ask, bewildered. "That's just dumb."

So why doesn't the same theory go for hair color? Personally, I think it has to do with the walls we build to separate and classify ourselves, as if somehow something as simple as the color of our hair can make us different- better, smarter, more fun, whatever- than someone else.